bentangle

Last night was Back to School night – my first of presumably many to come.  My Cricket started kindergarten last week, so last night my wife and I went to sit in hobbit-sized chairs at low tables to hear all about her school days.  It is still a little surreal that she has made this step – that she has grown from the squealing, crawling little thing that she used to be into this walking, talking little person that is now learning things away from home and developing her own experiences and opinions of the world.  Congrats, Cricket – oh the places you’ll go.

P.S. – I’ve decided that while I avoid using my kids real names here, I’m getting tired of always referring to them as my son and my daughter.  So from now on, my 5-year-old daughter will be referred to as Cricket and my 2-year-old son will be referred to as Grasshopper.  There are stories to go with those names, but I’ll save those for another day.

Upon taking the kids to Dutch Wonderland this weekend, I learned a few things about my 2-year-old son and 5-year-old daughter.  Here is a short list:

1. My son has a limited understanding of (or patience for) lines – if he saw an opportunity to weave his way through the crowd, he would take it.
2. My daughter has no qualms about assisting in hampering such efforts including but not limited to clotheslining him mid-getaway.
3. My daughter, despite her patience with such lines, seems to let her excitement to get to the next thing hamper her judgment (such as making sure anyone is actually following her).
4. Fruit flies have a longer attention span than my son (once he is old enough, he will likely need to be on medication).
5. No matter how many times she is asked to remain silent, my daughter is incapable of stopping the stream of consciousness that flows freely from her mouth – the only peace of the drive home came when she fell asleep.

In addition to the lessons about my kids above, I also learned the following life lessons:  I need a more reliable clip for my keys.  I should trust my instincts to (a) have my wife bring her keys and to (b) leave mine in the car.  Finally, my house is much easier to break into than it should be.  Luckily, my missing keys are already in the mail, my wife has orders to make several dupes of her keys, and our house’s weak point is already being addressed.  Things to add to a shopping list:  a new key clip, a hide-a-key rock, and possibly leashes.

You know that you’ve spent too much time fighting to get your kids to eat when you are arguing with them to eat their dessert.  That seems to be the position I found myself last night with my son over a bowl of lemon pudding.  We had made an instant box of it and divvied it up 4 ways evenly.  My daughter, my wife and I ate ours up pretty swiftly (it IS pudding – there isn’t really any chewing and what’s not to like), but my son seemed to eat about half of his and then proceeded to engage in one of his favorite past times – jumping on and dismantling the couch.

I only pushed him on the pudding to get a sense of whether he was even interested in finishing it – not to force it on him (the less sugar the better, really).  But he was too busy bouncing around to pay any attention to the line of questioning.  So I finally put it such that if he doesn’t want the rest, someone else would gladly finish it for him – to which my 5-year-old daughter responds “I’d like to volunteer to be that person.” I swear that not a week goes by that she doesn’t surprise me with some new word or phrase that she has seamlessly integrated into her vocabulary.

I shouldn’t find this all that new and surprising – these phases are normal.  But I don’t remember it being so over-powerfing when it happened a few years ago when I daughter was about 2.  With young kids running circles around you, it is hard to fight these things and there is little point in trying to hide it – I have the blues.  By this I mean the Blue’s Clues blues.

My daughter went through a phase where it was her favorite show.  It is a pretty clever show, and unlike some others geared towards that age bracket, it is easy to watch with the kids.  So I often would watch it with her.  Now that my son is 2 1/2 and developing his own preferences, he has discovered a love for Blue and her pals.  And in the process my wife, my daughter and I are getting reacquainted.

My son delights in the show.  He sings along with every song.  He imitates everything that Steve or Joe do.  And even when he isn’t watching it, he references it in most things he does from skidoo-ing out of the car to the sidewalk to pretending an old greeting card is ‘a letter from our friends’.  And I think that to some extent it has been encouraging him to be more polite in the things he does.

My daughter and I have used it as a point of conversation.  We’ve discussed the relationship and pseudo-drama of the Steve-Joe switch (she has decided that she likes Joe better – I had felt that way before, but I’ve been gaining new-found respect for Steve).  We’ve reveled in noticing the artistic minutia that is peppered in there for the non-target audience (such as the ever-changing artwork in the living room).  And I’ve also used it as a platform to help her understand animation and entertainment in general (separating the characters from the reality).

My wife and I try not to over-expose the kids to these things – we know that they should have limits to the amount of TV they watch.  But when they wake at 7AM every morning and can’t keep from being under-toe at every meal preparation, it is a crutch that is easy to lean on to give us the space or rest that we need to be sane enough to keep up with them the rest of the time.

What is funny about the show is how well it works and how well it will likely continue to work for years to come.  The show is now over ten years old and has not aired a new episode in several years.  And yet it still remains in Noggin’s heavy program rotation.  I also recently saw a 10-year behind the clues special that revealed some interesting factoids about the show and its origins (e.g., the show’s original design was to be a game-show for toddlers, Blue was initially a cat, Mr. Salt was supposed to have a Brooklyn accent but it somehow got shifted to French).

So at 33, I’m still learning a few new tricks from a not-so-young puppy – and bonding with my kids at the same time (you can bond over a show – it counts, I looked it up).  Without a doubt, I once again have the Blue’s Clues blues … and it makes me smile.

Kids can say surprising things – from hilarious to awe-inspiring.  Here are a few recent gems from my clan:

1. From 5yo daughter – “Wouldn’t it be cool if dogs could talk – not just communicate, but talk like people do?”
2. From 2yo son regarding a nearby pet store with a paw print logo – “Let’s go to Blue’s Clues store.”
3. From 5yo while walking in a stream and talking about the animals that live in the stream under the rocks – “So am I squishing all their houses right now?”
4. My wife recently had another MRSA-infected cut so we had to go through decontamination.  While swabbing my daughter’s nostrils with an antibiotic salve, my son pipes up “I want white boogers, too!”
5. From daughter – “Mommy, I love you ten.  But Daddy, I love you eleven.”  (she has always been a daddy’s girl)